This Just In!!!

Kim Kardashians butt is not fake! Now she faces the arduous task of proving that the rest of her persona is real as well...

AAFES Prices OCONUS and in Deployed Locations

Straight up dude, they fucking suck. It does not cost you $45 to get a tub of whey protein to Manas. Stop calculating your gas prices once a month when its changing every day. Come to think of it, how can you tell us your selling gas tax free when you calculate your own prices based on stateside gas prices that include sales tax. So if you base prices off of average prices with tax, aren't you just taking advantage of us?  Fuck You. The only reason people put up with it is because its marginally cheaper than German or Brit gas.

FUCK YOU AAFES
sincerely, me

Fort Polk AAFES Gun Counter

 I guess this doesn't fall into my normal 'Fuck You Louisiana, so I'm giving it its own segment.... "FUCK YOU AAFES!!!".

I've had a couple of dealings with the gun counter at the local aafes establishment and have come to this conclusion: government wages do not buy subject matter experts. My first major issue was when the clerk at the counter tried to tell me that the sight on my special ordered H7R handi rifle was not missing, but in fact was intended to be mounted with a scope. Funny thing was, it had a front sight on it already and holes where the rear sight should have been mounted. Strange how that works out... Anyway, since I had to put money down to get the thing ordered in the first place (and was planning on putting a scope on it anyway) I dropped a complaint in the feedback box and left it at that. Didn't help that deer season was only a efw weeks away and I couldn't wait any longer to get into my load development.

Next incident involved a Taurus pistol. In this case, they let me hold the display model, but not the one in the box that I was actually taking home. Little bit paranoid, but in the wake of the shootings at Ft Hood I guess I understand. Not the end of the world. Get the thing home however, and no one has even bothered to clean the thing off a little. There was so much grease on this gun, I had to break out a whole roll of paper towels to get the thing cleaned up. Not a massive issue, but still an attention to detail thing that should have been addressed at the store (some on, every other gun place I have been to around here cleans their shit before selling it, and this is fucking Louisiana!! Should be ashamed of yourselves AAFES...).

Last straw was the new clerk at the counter trying to explain the merits of the .22lr in a home defense scenario. I know that gun counter folks are wide ranging and tell all kinds of tales, but that's seriously bordering on the irresponsible. The last thing I want is for some random army wife to get into a situation where she thinks that little .22 is going to save her life and it doesn't follow through (because I'm telling your right now, 95 out of 100 times its going to be insufficient). Anyway, long story short, I'm taking my business somewhere else (Like Nichols). Shits sake, I'll even go back to Star Pawn or Walmart before I go back to the Px.

FUCK YOU AAFES!
sincerely, me

Pelican Rifle/Gear Cases - Hands on Review

I've been using Pelican cases for my duty weapons and gear for a number of years now, but finally broke down and got one to fit a couple of my own personal weapons. They survive deployments and training TDYs without a hitch, and if you can afford them its 100% worth the money.

Good Stuff: One of the toughest products I have ever had the pleasure of using. I can honestly that I have never seen one of these cases fail, despite deployment and training stresses and general heavy military use. It is a touch heavier than some other cases, but considering the much better durability (and the fact that it has wheels for the weak-armed individuals out there) its a non-issue. My personal case came with the solid foam, which I custom cut to hold a couple of rifles (which saved me a few bucks) but you can also get custom made foam inserts from the manufacturer.

Bad Stuff: It would be irresponsible of me not to mention the price here. This level of protection doesn't come cheap, so your looking at a couple hundred dollar investment.

Overall: Probably don't need a Pelican case for the occasional trip to the range or once a year trip to deer camp. However, if you have some serious travel (airline or otherwise) in your future or will be seeing some tough conditions, then Pelican is definitely worth it. A couple hundred dollar investment will protect your couple thousand dollar rifles, and you will be happy. The end.

AT&T Wireless of Western Louisiana

In a rare double-whammy edition of 'Fuck You Louisiana!' I will be exploring the merits (or in fact, the lack there of) of AT&T Wireless in the central and especially western portion of Louisiana. Now don't get me wrong, every other cell service has garbage service out here, but AT&T is the only one who boasts of having decent service; at least Verizon and the rest can be honest that they don't serve this nasty ass hick region.

We waited 8 months of the last year with garbage phone service because AT&T swore they where installing 3G for the area. One year later, my phone has started saying "3G AT&T", but it's funny... service is just as slow and crappy as it ever was. They offered us a 3G Microcell (basically a mini hot spot that runs off your internet), but it hogs up so much of my already slow internet (see previous rant about suddenlink) that I have to make a decision between internet/Netflix on my xbox or good cell service. This is bullshit people; utter bullshit. Is it really that hard to install sufficient cell phone towers in an area to provide good service? Or have you been serving Lousiana for so long that you've started to take advantage of people like everyone else in this godforsaken shithole of a state? Anyway, I digress.

Fuck You Louisiana!
sincerely, me

Suddenlink Cable and Internet, Deridder Louisiana

Hurray for another edition of 'Fuck You Louisiana!'. Today, I dedicate my time to Suddenlink cable internet and phone service. Basically, its the only option for internet and cable TV that doesn't involve a satellite dish. Unfortunately, the service is still pretty ghetto; lots of channels that either don't work or are insanely pixilated, crappy customer service, and prices that (while better than satellite) border on the obscene when you consider how crappy the hook up is. Internet is technically DSL, but speeds are closer to old school dial up; I don't know if its because Louisiana's infrastructure is a byzantine piece of shit, but it still sucks. So in summary, while Suddenlink is the least crappy of all the options in western Louisiana, its still ghetto as all hell.

Fuck You Louisiana!
Sincerely, me

Deridder Walmart Patrons

In this episode of 'Fuck You Louisiana!' I recount my experiences with Deridder, LA residents at the local Wally World. To be totally honest, I'm not surprised; but that doesn't mean I can't still be disappointed.

So I was standing in the checkout line, minding my own business when one of the locals pushed her cart up behind me and jammed it firmly into my hip. I turned around to see who had hit me, and she gave me a look like I was the asshole and said "Whut?". I asked if she could back up a bit, to which she replied by backing the cart up all of a millimeter. I thought it was over at this point; WRONG!

As I stepped forward and started loading bagged items into my cart, the bitch pushed the cart into my side again. Only this time, she was now blocking the credit card screen by about two and a half feet. When I finished loading my bags, I turned back and asked her politely if she would back up so I could swipe my card. She responded with "Whut? You can reach it."

It was at this point that I gave up on being polite, and told her (and I quote) "ok, then I can stand here with my credit card and wait for you to back your fat ass up. whats it going to be Jabba?". Her jaw dropped as she stared for a second, then she frowned and made a face and moved back a couple inches.

I pulled out my cell phone and checked the time and told her "still waiting princess". She snarled again and moved back a foot.

I rolled my eyes and told her "can we move this along?". She about lost it, "what the fuck!? pay for your shit already!".

"I would if you would drag your ass backward another foot! Is that really so hard for you tubby?". She looked like she wanted to strangle me, but she finally stepped back another foot, at which I returned to my normal politeness and thanked her kindly. I stood in front of the counter and promptly whipped exact change for the transaction, handed it the cashier (who laughed), smiled and left the building.

The end.

FUCK YOU LOUISIANA!!
Sincerely, me

Hodgdon Benchmark Reloading Powder: Hand on Review

I've been working with this powder for a while now, and I'm constantly surprised by what I can wring out of it performance-wise. Granted it's not the end-all rifle powder or the top of the line target stuff, but it's a good value, a good all-around powder and very easy to handle.

The Good Stuff: First off, I like that this powder is fairly fine without being so fine its difficult to accurately meter, ensuring a uniform burn and less chance of being cut by the powder measure. The smell is very strong compared to other powders and very identifiable when fired, but not in an unpleasant way (sorry, I get nostalgic on Hoppes solvent too. It happens). Price is very good; not the cheapest out there, but nestled happily around the middle ranges of common rifle powder. Still, the performance you get is well worth many more expensive powders.

What I like most about Benchmark is its sheer versatility. It has become my go-to powder for all my precision varmint/target rifles, as well as my beater dear rifle. I won't post full load or rifle descriptions because I'm not in the business of doing that (so I'll understand if you take these numbers with a grain of salt), but the results where impressive by anyones standards. In 308 winchester, it has marked average groups of .30 MOA with the best group down to .26 MOA. In 223 Remington, it averages .35 MOA with a best group of .32 MOA. Most impressive, it turned my beater 45-70 Handi rifle that wouldn't even group with factory ammo into a .95 MOA deer killer! Hurray!

Bad Stuff: If you have a sensitive nose, the smell might be an issue in-doors. It's not the top tier target rifle powder, so don't go and expect to be slaughtering world records with it. Also, I don't recommend using it for cast lead bullets; most of my test groups where not terrible, but where easily overshadowed by other powders.

Over All: Very good powder, and definitely recommend it to others. For a very long time, this was the only rifle powder I kept in good supply and, if I hadn't started playing with cast lead, it probably still would be. The price is right and the performance is great, so I really have no gripes worth posting.

Wallace Eye Surgery, Alexandria Louisiana

Today on "Fuck You Louisiana!" we detail the latest in shitty Ophthalmologists (thats eye doctors for us lay people) in our review of Wallace Eye Surgery in Alexandria Louisiana! The short version is they are lazy and minipulative, but I'll elaborate in a bit.

The Good Things: None that I know of. Seriously. There may be college degrees involved, but that doesnt make these people any more friendly (especially not for us active duty personnel on tricare). For all I know they may do good things for anyone with civilian health insurance, but I'm not one of those people. If you are military, and on Tricare, stay FAR FAR AWAY.

Shitty things/Summary: Don't even come here; they don't care about you or your families health, and they know that the government will pay for the appointment either way so they don't give a shit. They turned my daughters hour long eye exam into a 4 hour nightmare (half of which was because the doctor decided to go on his fucking lunch break instead of doing his job). Next, when I asked them for an explanation, they gave me the run around before finally becoming rude and refusing to tell me any thing until I had a written request for information from Tricare. Finally, despite being active duty and fully covered, they demanded payment up front. I will not be returning; if I have to, I'll drive to San Antonio. I don't know who is more anti-military; the Taliban or Wallace Eye Care and Surgery.

Fuck You Lousiana!
sincerely, me